Memories of Spring

After enduring 6 months of a harsh London Winter which is becoming the norm, where I didn’t head off for sunnier climes (middle class problems),  it’s finally showing signs of warming up for Spring.  We had about 5 days the other week of lovely weather, then I had to put my heating on again as it was cold.   This week looks like perking up again.

I can now venture into my garden and see what damage the Winter has done.

My table is warped and dressed with a tablecloth made of moss

My fence is half broken and rotten splintered wood pokes out from the jasmine plant that is slowly dragging itself to the ground in long drawn out suicide attempt

Blossom is absent since the council decapitated the trees, now it’s silhouette is akin to the form of Nosferatu

Creeper weeds strangled all of the plants and threaten to remake The Day of The Triffids

My bike sits rusting, tires as deflated as it’s spirit

Garden pest remains adorn the concrete paving like the aftermath of a bloody battle – Game of Slugs

Cat poop carpets the soil as Lily makes the Guinness Book of Records for world’s largest litter tray.

Ashtrays sit overflowing with cigarette butts swollen from rainwater like hamster’s tampons

The BBQ is veiled in a waterproof cover resembling R2D2 in a burqa

I thought back to happier times for my garden, so dug out these photos of when it was looking more presentable.






Leave a comment


  1. Le Clown

     /  May 4, 2013

    I’d like to personally thank you for omitting pictures of your ashtray…. I’m still drinking my first coffee which means I need more pics like the last one, with kitty charming me.
    Le Clown

  2. It has been cleaned up since I wrote this, so much better again. Don;t think about the ashtray, I use a purple watering can so it doesn’t look like an ashtray. The fact it was overflowing with butts though is not a pleasant thought. Lily is a charming cat, she’s curled up on the sofa opposite me now. Well, she’s charming until she’s hungry. I’ll enjoy the silence while I can.

  3. I am jealous Joe. Oz is doing the exact opposite thing right now.

  4. Love the flowers! Sorry winter kicked your ass.

  5. Lily! All the pictures are great, but I see you saved the best for last.

  6. Loved the flowers, you better get that fence fixed before it become a danger!

  7. Hamsters tampons……..

  8. No need to merely member. Now is the time to live it.

  9. Hope the season of renewal brings new life to your garden! (Or something equally cheesily inspirational…)

  10. Still spring cleaning here too. Like you I just pulled off my tablecloth, only mine was made of pollen. hachoo!

  11. Look at that sweet Lily face! I forgot she was a tortie. I love torties. The description of the hamster tampons is really charming, by the way. I also like “R2D2 in a burqa.” You do have a way with words, sir.

  12. It sounds as if you’ve got some work ahead of you to get the garden looking again like the photos. Looks terrific in summer! I hope you enjoy the after winter clean up/assessment process.

  13. I hate that first venture out after the winter which starts here December 20 and ends Feb. 15 so I can’t complain too much and yet all my flowers look horrible and every year I think it will never look good again, but it always does. I love your little back yard and those beautiful vines. And what pretty flowers you had last year. I wonder if you tried burying the cigarette butts if little cigarette trees would grow?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: