Home Sweet Home

As a newly enrolled member of the Pinterest community (yes, my finger is on the pulse of technology, I’ve even just upgraded my portable gramophone to a “CD player” I believe they are called)

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This ISN’T me (in case you were wondering!)

I am becoming obsessed by the genius home makeovers aswell as the ludicrous uses for a toilet roll tube.   What caught my eye though were wall decor as I am currently planning my own framing project (you get to call household chores projects).

Amongst the displays are word art or decal.  It reminded me of a friend who cannot abide things with words on them, ie, bowls with ‘pasta’ written on them.   As if you are so forgetful that you eat your pasta out of the cat bowl by mistake.

His wife (that sounds weird to say that, she’s my friend too.  Husband and Wife…makes us sound too grown up, and we get blinding drunk and don’t act grown up at all)   Anyway, she has created a Pinterest board and is beginning to curate a selection of such examples, all the name of irritating him – naturally I am right on board with this idea.

You can go to the bathroom and be instructed to wash:

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In the bedroom, to ‘sleep’ or even to ‘dream’.

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Even ones that remind you the Lord is all around us and that he likes yellow

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With this in mind I invented the following wall decor for when your brain wanders off into another realm and you have no idea why you are standing there.

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And there was one obvious one that needed to be done anyway:

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What obvious things do you need reminding to do at home that some wall decal would resolve?

Maybe you need reminding to put underwear on, or to open the milk carton before drinking from it.

Or what wall decal do you actually have at home?!  Fess up, come on…

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49 Comments

  1. I’ve a bottle of Smirnoff stashed amongst me white goods to Joe! This is gonna be massive.

    Reply
  2. “Fake it ’til you make it!” posted above the bed?

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  3. Hellojed

     /  June 18, 2013

    I am humbled by my mention in this wonderful blog post. Bravo Joe. Bravo.

    I can quite honestly say that we have zero decal in the house, as the husband wouldn’t stand for it. He also looks down on others who have even a trace of it in their houses. Yes, he’s a decal snob.

    Perhaps you could put ‘telephone’ over a toilet, so that you can talk to God on the big white telephone and know you’re using it correctly?

    Reply
    • Or what if you simply got the jars that had “Pasta”decals, but used them instead for beans? And you could put sugar in the “Coffee” labeled jar. Perhaps place ant traps in the Cookie jar?

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      • Ruby, I don’t think you are taking word decal seriously. Beans in the pasta jar?! That’s fucked up!

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        • I’m a rebel!!!

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          • We need rebels in our cause, I just emailed you about the banning. Check it out, quite hilarious unintentionally. I don’t think I’ve ever been held in such disregard 🙂

            Reply
    • You know what I am buying as a house warming gift now.

      🙂

      Reply
  4. Not sure I’d be able to sleep with a big neon DREAM buzzing over my head all night…

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  5. I don’t have any such ‘decorations.’ Though I could do with “Shut Up and Sit Down”? in the entry way.

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  6. As of today…GET OVER IT…would be nice. Wouldn’t even need to be in writing. Someone could just call me and say it…then hang up. That would be really really nice….

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  7. I am wordless, both in print & on my possessions, but I love the words you suggested, like Drink Vodka & Order Takeaway . . .

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    • Most homemakers keep vodka stashed away in places the rest of the family daren’t venture. Or maybe that was just my house 🙂

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  8. I keep meaning to stencil “This Wall Intentionally Left Blank” on all my walls. Except the kitchen. I’m going to borrow your idea for the kitchen.

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    • That idea would probably sell, people don’t seem to think too hard about them. I just found a cover for a light switch that makes a statement along the lines of God is the light.

      Maybe when you switch your lights on, his go off – right in the middle of him doing a crossword

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  9. “Drink heavily” …posted anywhere in the house.

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  10. Just one:

    Attention Teenagers:
    Please move out whilst you still know everything.

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  11. I’m no fan of decals, although I do love the idea of having ‘masturbate’ in neon lights above my bed, as if I needed reminding.

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    • I’d still need my glasses to read it, and I take them off for bed. Words would be lost on me.

      How am I seeing your pic here without a WP account? Everyone is usually a pastel symbol when they don’t have an account

      Reply
  12. I have a smarmy inspirational wall cling about “making a difference” when you first walk into our office. I’m so ashamed.

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  13. I’ve resorted to putting post-it notes on my door so I can’t leave the house without seeing them. But eventually I ignore them long enough so that I don’t even notice them anymore.

    My post-it notes are usually along the lines of “Buy more kitty litter” or “Don’t forget to take the chicken out to defrost.” Maybe a decal on the fridge saying “Stand there with the door open, hoping something interesting will suddenly materialize.”

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  14. Hahaha! I love this! The only thing I can think of is “Does it Stink in Here or Is It just You? In the entry way. Then off to the kitchen where it says, “I cook therefore I yam.” Then down the hall where it says, “Arsenio” Then into the bathroom, “”She was just a cattleman’s daughter, but all the horsemen knew her.” I think I could play here all day long! See what a bad influence you are on me Joe?

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    • These are all superb, there is a job waiting for you in the creative department of some Wall Decal company. Arsenio! Brilliant.

      I’m mildly annoyed by people’s homes on Pinterest (mainly American), they have entryways, mudrooms, pantry’s, walk in closets, two and a half baths. In London we still live like Victorians in tiny little abodes. Or maybe that’s just me.

      Actually I am lucky to have a little house (rented) in a cool part of town with a courtyard garden. It’s an old workers cottage, it’s not very cottagy except that it’s small.

      My entryway is my living room, you are straight in it from the street. My mudroom is my living room floor. I could walk into my wardrobe but I’d get stuck. And I have one bath.

      Reply
      • It’s really hard not having an entryway. People just open the door to your house and there you are! And then there’s nowhere to put the stuff you’ve carried in. (You probably have to go put in where it actually belongs instead of leaving on the entryway table!

        It’s funny, I’ve always thought it would be really cool to live in an English cottage. I really love your backyard garden.

        Here everybody lives in 3 bedroom 2 bath houses with 2 car garages. But mostly we only live in the family room and the kitchen and most Americans fill their garages up with junk so that they can’t even get their cars in anymore. We really abuse all the living space we have.

        I used to live in a house with four bedrooms and three baths. I spent all my time cleaning the rooms I never went in. The older I get, the happier I am with having a smaller living space.

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        • Good point, my spare room gets used maybe 5 nights a year, the rest of the time it’s just another place the cat sleeps on her house patrols.

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          • Cats are the big winners in every situation when you really think about it. 😀

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            • As I read this she sashayed in and just glared at me. She knows we’re talking about her. She’s now sat on sofa opposite and is continuing to stop my heart from beating with just her stare. Feeding cat treats should save me from a grisly demise.

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  15. I am like your friend and resent my bowl announcing what I can put in it. My biggest peeve relating to word on things: clothing. I don’t want Anyone’s name on my ass (think “Juicy” brand) but my own. (Though I don’t really embroider my name on my clothing.)

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    • Good one, of course, writing on clothes is dumb. You could bedazzle your name on clothes (is that the write word?) As well as silly slogans, I never saw the point in people wearing shirts emblazoned with a manufacturers name, like “GAP” It’s just a shop. I find that very odd, maybe if you work there and it’s your staff uniform but why else would you walk around advertising a store. I could expand on this in a post, and I might!

      Reply

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