Chick-Fil-A in Marriage Protest

Politician Rick Santorum today stepped into the furore surrounding Chick-Fil-A’s CEO Dan Cathy’s petition to legalize chicken marriage.

Mr Cathy’s campaign has gained further momentum of late as his calls to cement the bond between man and chicken in the eyes of the Lord has met with scorn from parts of society.

Mr Santorum voiced his support for man/chicken love urging fellow Americans to back the campaign by feasting at the fast food outlet.

Dan Cathy, the CEO of one of the nations largest family owned businesses, pictured here with his long-term partner, Henrietta, went on record as saying “This is a loving union, but in some corners of society our relationship is looked at with derision, that it is somehow unacceptable.  We’ve been living in the shadows for too long now and we have the right to be treated as equals”

When questioned about the rather blunt naming of the chain “Chick-Fil-A” Mr Cathy replied “Chick-Fil-A in name only, Henrietta and I sleep apart, we are firm believers in no sex before marriage”

The response to this has since been overwhelming, with people turning up in their thousands in support of Chicken marriage at Chick-Fil-A branches across the country.

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25 Comments

  1. I hope man/chicken nugget relationships are sanctioned too!

    Reply
  2. The last taboo has been opened! Well done and well done Rick and co.

    Reply
  3. Juliana

     /  August 2, 2012

    Love it!!!

    Reply
  4. There will be no giblet ratteling tonight… not as long as I am the one who gets to randomly decide who has the right to do what to who… or whom… or poultry. Just because they are chikens, doesn’t mean they can get laid… er…um… sort of. If god had wanted man and chicken to shafre the bonds of holy matrimony, he wouldn’t have said it was an abberation right there in the bible on page one… what?… it doesn’t say that anywhere in the bible? Just pigs? Really? Oh, well, never mind, carry on, you chicken pluckers.

    Reply
    • I wish I knew some bible quotes to substitute things for chicken related jokery.

      I’m finding it all quite amusing now, how people think making their voice heard is by eating a load of fast food. What a depressing world (their world, not mine – I’m loving mine)

      Reply
  5. Obviously I meant ‘share’ the bonds of holy matrimony in the above comment… shafreing the bonds would still be evil, because I am sure the bible says that, verily shalt we check our spelling before condeming sinners to hell with no typos, lest they… what? Are you kidding? Nothing at all about spelling? Not in the whole good book, you say? Oh, for christ’s sake… whoops… sorry…

    Reply
    • I noticed but I wouldn’t bring it up, I am forever making typos and using the wrong punctuation.

      I’m trying to think of what I don’t approve of then I can campaign against it on a completely random way like the chicken eaters are doing.

      I don’t like Mcdonalds in the Olympics and the press reporting Usain Bolt was queing up for it, other athletes have been interviewed saying how they can’t wait for the end of the Olympics so they can have some McNuggets. What a terrible image to pass on to kids.

      I’ll campaign by walking around with two trout hanging out of my back pockets for the remainder of the Olympics. Do you think it will catch on if Boris Johnson tells people to carry fish around in their pockets too?

      Reply
      • To be honest, I only know who Boris is because Jon Stewart of the Daily Show does jokes about his hair… I am an American. We barely know where Europe is, remember.
        Trout, trout, let it all out… these are the protests that we dream about…
        Why did that remind me of an old song?

        Reply
        • What song is that? I’m trying for a tune but nothing is coming to mind

          I posted once on Boris when he was voted back in, he’s famous for being a bumbling fool. Check out him at the Olympics this week, he was stuck on a zip wire dangling in the air, it went viral and people have photoshopped it a lot.

          Reply
  6. This is so beautiful. I never thought I’d say this, but thank you, Rick Santorum. Thank you for daring to embrace the love that dare not speak its name.

    Reply
  7. Hahaha! We all knew Santorum liked his cock and other types of poultry 😉

    Reply
  8. clownonfire

     /  August 3, 2012

    Joe,
    I think it’s a beautiful thing what Rick Santorum is trying to do for all Chicken marriages. I’m all for it… as long as the chicken’s white.
    Le Clown

    Reply
    • Doesn’t chicken have white and dark meat? Now I’m just confused and don’t know what to think, can any republicans help me out here?

      Reply
  9. Hi, congratulations I have just nominated you for the Inspiring Blogger award here http://www.bit.ly/Award14 enjoy!

    Reply
    • Thanks LP, I’ll check it out in the week when I’m at work (I seem to have more time on my hands then)

      Reply
  10. So that’s what people mean when they say ‘I feel like chicken tonight.’ I never got it until now.

    Reply
    • I’ve got the advert in my head now, flapping my arms singing that phrase. That’ll be stuck in my head all day

      Reply

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