A Very British Pastime

Of course I’m talking about the weather.  We love it.

The UK media are creating a shit-storm about an impending drought coming to the South East of the country.

Africa plan to hold a music festival to raise awareness for our plight along with other measures to raise money to help our blighted nation – Barely A-Live Aid.

This comes just months after severe floods in parts of the country and weeks after the UK was blanketed in snow, doesn’t snow melt and turn into water or was I smoking in the toilets during that science lesson?

Warnings of climate change is quite exciting for us Brits as we look forward to warmer weather in years to come, so far our attempts have been in vain as we have had two of the coldest Winter’s on record.   But we’ll persevere, show our great British spirit that served us well in the war, and use twice as much antiperspirants to speed things along.

The map below shows how climate change will affect the UK’s borders.  My hometown has gone the way of Atlantis and I will soon be living in the renamed London-on -Sea (it’s underwater on this map but I live in North London so I should be in a great spot on the water’s edge.

I’m not sure why Wales get’s away unscathed though, it looks like everyone will have to move west to Wales unless evolution presents us with gills.   Given the choice of drowning or living in Wales I think it is going to come down to a coin toss for many people.

I just received the following photos and magazine cuttings from the year 2075.

Time travel is possible then and I asked my niece to send these back to me from the future so we can see what effect the flooding has had, they just so happened to have dropped through my letterbox this week.

Now/then in her 60’s, my niece, took this picture on a day out at the seaside.

Lazy days at Westminster beach

Yes, this really is The Queen, she doesn’t abdicate the throne and reigns for another 60 years due to advancements in the medical world, this shot is from Hello magazine.

The Queen and a friend swap horses for a jetski

Traditional British weather used to drive celebrities to other countries, that and the tax breaks, but with the advent of tropical climes they came back in their droves. Picture here are Posh, Sporty and Baby Spice (the other two are dead or something).

 

London buses had to adapt into seaplanes to transport commuters:

Oh yeah, and there are cat people in the future

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20 Comments

  1. laurengraceevans

     /  February 22, 2012

    Love those amazingly edited photos of the future. Bit disappointed that my hometown will also be underwater. Wales it is then…

    Reply
    • Edited?! – those are real, though I can’t be sure if Hello magazine have airbrushed The Queen.

      I’m not buying Wales either, I’d sooner take my chanes out at sea, though I hope it’s more fun than that Kevin Costner movie.

      Reply
      • laurengraceevans

         /  February 22, 2012

        My apologies for implying your photos were edited!
        I think I’m going to have to get myself one of those seaplane/London buses to live and travel in. It’ll be my futuristic caravan.

        Reply
        • Thank you, you don;t want to incur the wrath of the cat people who will take over.

          Great idea, shame it cannot be submersible also.

          Reply
          • laurengraceevans

             /  February 22, 2012

            Obviously it would also need some sort of defense system against the cat people. I don’t fancy a half cat half person jumping aboard my seaplane/London bus.

            Reply
            • Yes, there will be segregation at first but eventually everyone accepts the cat people

              Reply
              • laurengraceevans

                 /  February 23, 2012

                We may end up accepting them, however, is it correct that cats hate water? And if so, why would they want to stay on our half-sunken island?

                Reply
  2. Funny stuff. I live in San Diego, and every time it rains, they call it the storm of the decade on the news. If they ever got real weather, this place would panic like you wouldn’t believe. The Queen, bless her, is looking kind of hot.

    Reply
  3. Well at least you guys believe in climate change unlike the right wing freaks here who want everyone to believe man walked with dinosaurs right after Eve ate the apple.

    Reply
    • They believe in dinosaurs? But there’s evidence of those, just like with climate change. Not that I have kids to leave a decent planet to.

      Reply
  4. Loved the photos. We are currently in the warmest winter we’ve evah had. well, maybe the warmest that I can remember, anyway. There is zero snow on the ground today (normally we have three or four feet) It’s 50 degrees right now (which to us is beach bikini weather) I’m not scientist. I’m not even that smart. But yeah, I can tell you this: something is seriously f-ed up.

    Reply
    • It does sound odd, was freezing last night and today it will be 17 degrees centigrade which is about 60 fahrenheit I think. Weird.

      Reply
  5. The sad thing about those double-decker seaplanes is that the view isn’t really that much better on the top level.

    Reply
  6. I had no idea the queen had that rocking body! Learn something new every day. 🙂

    Reply
  1. All Hail The Queen « londonsurvival

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